tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post114960951827941182..comments2023-10-19T07:54:32.841-04:00Comments on Quod She: Making friends?Dr. Viragohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03960384082670286328noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1150462272045243962006-06-16T08:51:00.000-04:002006-06-16T08:51:00.000-04:00I completely agree that it's so hard to make frien...I completely agree that it's so hard to make friends as an adult - the Dutchman and I have been in social isolation here for a year b/c all the professors are commuters and we live in town. We also could have tried harder, maybe, but knowing it was a one-year gig...<BR/><BR/>Question: is Buffy buying lunch?medieval womanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17278854285443306227noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149886181948045302006-06-09T16:49:00.000-04:002006-06-09T16:49:00.000-04:00/comfortTry the luncheon and hope there are some o.../comfort<BR/><BR/>Try the luncheon and hope there are some other people there.<BR/><BR/>It seems especially hard to make friends outside of work in the midwest, doesn't it?<BR/><BR/>When you find a good way, let me know, please! (and it has to NOT involve scrapbooking!)Bardiachttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11846065504793800266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149859321567240842006-06-09T09:22:00.000-04:002006-06-09T09:22:00.000-04:00AW -- Actually, she's even into Buffy in a cheesy ...AW -- Actually, she's even into Buffy in a cheesy way, or at least a really, really enthusiastic way with which I can't identify. She calls Whedon the Creator. With a capital C.<BR/><BR/>Meanwhile, her other friends, from what I know, *aren't* Mom types. But like me, her social circle here is small, so I'm sure she's trying to expand it. It's just -- would we be friends if we had a bigger pool to choose from?<BR/><BR/>Oh, and for the record, MT, *all* my friends are Buffy fans, and in fact, I'm probably the *least* devoted fan of the bunch.<BR/><BR/>BUT...the rest of you are right. I should stop being such a snob about scrapbooking and what have you and just give it a chance. (Next time, that is -- I actually couldn't go to the luncheon.)<BR/><BR/>But Virgo Sis is right, too -- I need to try to make friends *outside* work. But that's even harder. In the big cities it was a little easier because there were so many people moving into those places looking to make new connections, but here everyone's so darn local and set in their ways. And the running group didn't have a group run, btw -- I only ever saw those people at races. (But I think that's changed -- I know if I hadn't forgotten to renew my membership. D'oh!)<BR/><BR/>Argh!<BR/><BR/>6/08/2006 6:00 PMDr. Viragohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03960384082670286328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149803025785453172006-06-08T17:43:00.000-04:002006-06-08T17:43:00.000-04:00If she's a big Buffy fan, I'm guessing the odds ar...If she's a big Buffy fan, I'm guessing the odds are she's less into the Cult of Cheese than she might seem. Buffy, after all, was pretty damn twisted at times! I wonder whether her enthusiasm about you is powered by the hope that she might be able to be quirkier around you than she is around her other Midwestern Mom friends?Ancrene Wiseasshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02075637582360688845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149798567634670662006-06-08T16:29:00.000-04:002006-06-08T16:29:00.000-04:00I say go for it. You say that it's a luncheon--so ...I say go for it. You say that it's a luncheon--so I assume that there will be other people there? You might click with some of them even if not with her.<BR/><BR/>As the dating service says: It's Just Lunch. You're not promising to be best buds with Buffy, and if she turns out to be not really your type, you can cheerfully turn down other future invitations.Flaviahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17832765671541392835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149795506248337482006-06-08T15:38:00.000-04:002006-06-08T15:38:00.000-04:00Big Sis Advice: Go beyond the workplace. It's alw...Big Sis Advice: Go beyond the workplace. It's always complicated. As you know, I have plenty of friends I've made through work, but few have developed into deep friendships, or at least not until one of us changed jobs.<BR/><BR/> Runners groups? Cooking class? Political groups? Just some ideas.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149794706847545202006-06-08T15:25:00.000-04:002006-06-08T15:25:00.000-04:00Anyway, do you not want to talk about Buffy to any...Anyway, do you not want to talk about Buffy to anybody ever? Why can't she be the friend with whom you talk about Buffy? For however many minutes a week that's worth? Nobody is a friend for everything, even a spouse.MThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02341704109256270557noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15231380.post-1149794430518123202006-06-08T15:20:00.000-04:002006-06-08T15:20:00.000-04:00I wanted to say bite the bullet and give it a chan...I wanted to say bite the bullet and give it a chance, but then I remembered recently dodging an overture myself. Actually, I came to regret it, now that I think about it, so perhaps it wouldn't be hypocritical for me to egg you on as I first meant to. Yes, do not be a snob. Life is more foxhole than cocktail party. None of us can tell who anybody is just from the way they walk down the street. Also, if you think you're so cool, be a teacher. Nice, open-minded people were bigots before Rosa Parks and MLK. Taste and style aren't religions to people who aren't Goth or LandsEnd or some other trend-obsessed group-identifier. Of course, that's the philosophy part. I don't dare advise on the diplomacy part. I wonder if it would be possible to be...sincere? You could advance your recovery from snobbery by admitting the scrapbooking actually put you off agreeing to have coffee with her, even though you've always thought her very nice.MThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02341704109256270557noreply@blogger.com